In fact, I’ve done that a lot and not just with teachers.
I’ve done it with boyfriends. I’ve done it with friends.
But mostly with teachers.
Because I have an insatiable curiosity about things I’m interested in and love learning, I am sort of prone to making these people into a guru of some sort.
Or placing them on a pedestal.
Trouble with all of that is … they’re human. Like all of us.
They do stupid things (like all of us).
They say hurtful things (like all of us).
They make mistakes (blah blah blah).
Watching someone you’ve idolized fall off that pedestal is so hard. Especially because they often fall right on you.
And then you’re crushed and left without someone to guide you.
What you didn’t realize is that you were looking outside yourself for something you thought you didn’t have in you.
It took me a long time (and many crumbled pedestals) to get that part.
Each time, I stood up, dusted myself off (pedestal dust is very fine and you might find it in the unlikeliest places later) and kept on walking.
And each time, I resolved not to do that again.
Because damn it hurt to climb out underneath it, moving all those heavy pieces out of the way.
Pieces made up of my dreams that I gave away.
Pieces of me that I didn’t want to claim.
Pieces I was afraid to own.
I’ll be forever climbing out from underneath those pieces if I don’t truly understand that there are no gurus.
There are way-showers, yes.
But outsourcing my own self to someone else?
No matter who they are.
And I don’t want that with those who work with me. I want us to work *together* because I don’t have all the answers to your concerns. (You do, actually!)
But I can help you access them. In lots of ways. And teach you how to access them yourself.
I’m a way-shower.
What do you need to see?
And how can I help?