Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I am an unrepentant half-asser. I’ve half-assed school, I’ve half-assed work and I’ve sure as hell half-assed relationships.
And Father, the truth is, I’ve done pretty well half-assing things. I have a college degree, a sweet marriage, am a licensed stockbroker and run a thriving intuitive business. It’s taken me this long, though, to understand that there are some things you just cannot half-ass.
Your dreams. Father, you cannot half-ass your dreams.
This is a new lesson for me. See, my soul has been calling me to work with others in a way that sometimes feels scary to me. So I managed to soothe myself by creating a situation where I didn’t have to full-ass my dreams. I backed myself into a corner and then played victim to it. (How I love playing victim because it absolves me of any responsibility to do anything. Nice deal if you can get it, eh?)
But the thing is this: I created it because I was scared. I know that now. And I also know that the biggest lesson I learned is that I can no longer half-ass my dreams. If I do, I will regret it the rest of my days. I will have to admit that I did not live out my soul’s desire and potential.
Father, I commit on this day to full-assing my dreams. That means doing some things that feel hard. That means digging down deep and clearing out what stands in my way. And it means taking ownership of my life. If I’ve gotten this far doing things halfway, imagine what I could do if I played full out.
Just imagine. And them watch me.
I’ve kept a personal blog for over twelve years (hey! I have a lot to say!) and found this entry from 2011 and thought I’d share it.
(BTW, “Duty” is what I call my husband since he’s all about it)
For reals: OMFG, y’all
So, let’s recap, shall we:
1. I have sincere conversation with Duty about a timeline for my leaving pain in the ass day job. He says “$6000 in the bank and a possible part time job and then I might feel okay about it.”
1a. I haz a sad about it because I cannot stand day job any more.
2. Vow that no one shall stand in the way of what I want. Choose $3000/empowerment for manifesting amount and words, mindful that this is double what I had last month but what the hell, right? I can stand a bit of chaos.
2a. Universe laughs. And the
thunder chaos rolls.
3. Forced to take on 3x the amount of responsibility at work. Whole office is in uproar as the departure of one person has created a tear in the time-space continuum and all goes to hell on board the USS Enterprise.
4. At night, brain too fried to create classes as planned. Whole month’s income goes down the toilet as I barely make $1000.
5. Begin to make peace with the fact that $3000 and an “I will show all of you not to get in my way” attitude does not an abundant month make.
6. Work diligently at creating a more peaceful space and let go of the urgency to leave that damn job NOW.
7. Take a class on energy and family dynamics wherein I am told that a big part of my work now is to forgive myself for all that I have done or not done and to move on from that place. Truly forgive from a heartful place of compassion.
8. Take 2nd glass of wine, sit out under the stars and cry into a place of self-forgiveness for all manner of stupid shit in life.
9. Begin again to feel at peace with the flow of things.
10. Damn near crap my pants as $6000 falls into my lap out of nowhere. (I am so not kidding. It really did.)
11. Listen to Duty nearly crap his pants as I point out to him that he said if I had $6000 in the bank, I could quit day job. Know that he’s going to rain on my parade with this somehow but hope he gets that this is a gift from the Universe delivered through a specific channel. He both rains and gets.
12. Remind him that he told me last summer “I’m not sure I totally understand all this stuff you do but I have to say that weird things do happen around you that I can’t explain.”
13. Mention that I am not planning on leaving job tomorrow (or even in a month) but September is what I’m shooting for. Hear him heave a sigh of relief.
14. Laugh to myself about how the Universe and my Angels always, always amaze me.
15. Dance around house
16. Empowerment came through after all, yo!
Bestie Anni and I were talking the other day and she mentioned this quote from renowned author Sonia Choquette about meeting with your Guides:
“Another way to show appreciation is to keep a clean and organized home. If that’s asking too much, at least maintain the area around your altar in this manner. This shows your respect for the guides by giving them a peaceful, clear place to rest.
This right here? Bullshit of the highest order. Seriously.
How do I know?
In addition to being the High Priestess of the Woo, I am also the High Priestess of Clutter. And if the Guides demanded (needed/wanted) respect to be shown in this manner, I am quite sure either I’d be nudged to remove that clutter or else risk losing my ah-mazing skills.
Since neither has happened, I think it’s pretty safe to say Guides do not give one tinker’s damn about a peaceful, clear place to rest.
With all due respect to Sonia Choquette, I am enormously bothered when teachers (famous ones at that) say things like this because it sets conditions on working with Guides in Spirit. And that is never, ever the case.
You don’t have to have a clean house, a pure heart, a big purse to ask your Guides for help. Their support is UNCONDITIONAL. Always.
And this is what I mean when I speak of discernment. Here’s a respected teacher in the world of Woo setting conditions on how your Guides will work best with you.
Nope. Nope and oh yeah, nope.
Don’t accept it. Don’t take it in. Don’t allow it to make you feel less than because you’re a creature of clutter.
I’m not some fancy author with a butt-load of books to my name (yet!) but I am one of the clearest channels for Spirit Guide wisdom you will ever come across. So believe me when I tell you that your Guides are available to you – 100% – at all times, in all ways, in all conditions.
You need them? They’re there. All you have to do is ask.
The Subtle Body Practice Manual: A Comprehensive Guide to Energy Healing
Author Website: www.cyndidale.com
Confession time: I have haunted libraries all my life. You’d find me mostly hanging out in the new non-fiction section, hoping to snag something that’s just been released. Every once in a while, I happen upon something awesome and just can’t believe my good fortune. The Subtle Body Practice Manual: A Comprehensive Guide to Energy Healing by Cyndi Dale was the find of the season for me.
Dale, a prolific writer who is well-known and respected in the field of energy work, has just released this latest compendium of energy healing techniques and it’s a keeper. In fact, I returned it to the library the next day and bought my own copy to have among my reference books.
Early on in my study of metaphysics, I took lots and lots and lots of classes. Each one provided a bit more foundation for my knowledge but it was up to me to put the information together in a way that made sense. Not a hellish task for a natural student but for those who don’t dig it the way I do, books providing overviews of complex subjects are the best thing since, well, sliced bread!
In the introduction, she says this: “Looking deeper, we can observe that we are all self-healers all the time. Even when we are helping others under the aegis of being a trained practitioner, every training program and each client session is another opportunity to work on ourselves, to detoxify and rebuild in body, mind and spirit so that we might be a clearer conduit for subtle energies.”
More and more these days, people are looking inside themselves for ways to heal. But where to even start? Instead of buying a book about each different healing method (which gets expensive not to mention time-consuming if you plan to read them all) just add this one to your Kindle! Take a section at a time and practice some of the techniques Dale lists and see what works for you.
Now, it’s true that these techniques have been around for ages, passed down through tradition (like Reiki), used in secret military experiments (remote viewing) or seemingly reserved for those with “special skills” (shamanic journeying, as one example). In the space of 369 pages, Dale gives the low-down on topics ranging from “Making Subtle Energy Work for you” to “Essential Energy Techniques” to “Food as vibrational medicine”.
She skillfully weaves these disparate pieces together, showing the common threads and teaching the foundations and real-life application of each. You could spend the next five years playing around with each process and cataloging your experiences (There’s an interesting project!). Dipping into this book on an as-needed basis or when you feel a new way of processing events is called for, you’ll find a wealth of information, techniques and new perspectives.
One of the comments I found in Amazon reviews of The Subtle Body Practice Manual: A Comprehensive Guide to Energy Healing was that all this information can be found online. Why, the reviewer asked, would anyone purchase a book like this when the information can be found with “a little digging”?
Of course this information can be found if you want to spend hours and hours looking for links and verifying each one for truth and integrity! The value of this book rests in Dale’s skillful ability to discern only what you need to know about each technique to get you started. Should you feel drawn to learning more, surf away! (And check out her selection of other books on these topics – she’s written quite a bit on energy healing over the years.)
If you are at all interested in feeling more ‘at home’ in your own body and are willing to try some things that may touch the fringe of mainstream thought, start right here with Cyndi Dale’s book. I bet you’ll find something that fits you just right!
By Lisa Wechtenhiser
Seriously! Make that your one resolution in 2014 (along with no more cake for breakfast and being nicer to your spouse when you don’t want to).
This post came out of a conversation with a good friend about working with a coach. Now, I’m a big proponent of working with a coach, a mentor, a therapist. I’ve done all of that pretty much for the last thirty years.
And I am a coach, a mentor and a teacher (and I play a therapist on TV but that’s another story! heh), so I’m not saying that support isn’t helpful. All of those individuals helped me see a perspective that I couldn’t at the time. They also helped me step more into my soul potential and my work in this life.
Good stuff, yes?
Where I got hung up (as did my friend) was in believing that these people knew better than I did. After all, weren’t we paying them some good bucks to tell us what to do?
Lemme set you straight on that one, kids.
A coach, a therapist, a mentor – are all your partners. Just like your team of Guides and Teachers in Spirit. They are not gods you put on a pedestal or all-knowing amazing beings who will tell you the exact right steps to six-figure success.
Nope. Just normal people like you and me. Who happen to have expertise in an area you don’t.
When it comes to your business, your life, your own self-worth, start with the premise that you know more than just a little something about yourself. Because you do.
You’ve lived your life and while others can walk it with you, no one knows it and you like you do.
Don’t underestimate the power of that.
Tales of woe and power loss
Once upon a time, in a land far away (or right here, I’m not saying which) there was a girl who, despite being a voracious consumer of information products and reader of same, believed that others could tell her the magical formula for her business.
She chose one mentor, then another, always feeling like something wasn’t right.
But they know better, she thought. And I’m paying good money for it so they must know.
She tucked her feelings back on a shelf.
When she had wandered far away from her heart’s desire, she realized that she was the one who did this. Not this mentor or that coach.
She had chosen to believe them over herself because she was scared to trust herself.
Yet, the result of making that choice moved her further away than ever.
That doesn’t seem right.
So she decided to start back at square one, where she began back when she thought she had no idea what she was doing.
Turns out, that was right all along.
But she had to stray off her path to see it.
Moral of this woeful tale?
Trust your inner knowing above all else
Work WITH your coach, mentor and/or teacher. They may have more information on a certain topic than you do, but the decision on how to run your life, your business, your whatever ultimately rests with you.
Don’t give that beautiful part of you away.
You came in with it and it will serve your highest good if you allow it.
Will you allow it?
By Lisa Wechtenhiser
By Lisa Wechtenhiser
Lately, I’ve noticed the buzzword ‘shame’ everywhere.
Robert Ohotto talks about it often on his radio show.
Brene Brown writes about it in her books.
And the more I looked around, the more I noticed how we live (and somehow function) in a shame-based society.
As I understand it, shame is that feeling that in some profound way, you are not good enough, strong enough, defective at your core. The very essence of you is NOT ENOUGH.
Many of us (myself included) grew up with this feeling, as if it was part of our genetic make-up.
I lived in the shadow of my cousin, believing that I was ‘less than’ because I wasn’t like her. This feeling was reinforced in many ways and became part of how I viewed myself. “I wasn’t her, could never be her, so I suck” became my reality. It was a long time before I could differentiate my own skills and gifts from hers and be okay with it.
It’s so insidious and can really, really impact your own joy and satisfaction in the life you create.
And it can be a pretty big effort to transform that shame into an energy that moves you forward rather than holds you back.
Robert Ohotto mentioned something on his show the other night – how much of what we try to change is based in shame.
For example: if you want to lose weight, the feeling that gets you doing something might be “Geez, I look like a pig. What the hell is wrong with me? I can’t fit into any of my clothes and I’m just a pig. No one will want me looking like this.”
Look how shame-filled that diatribe is (and I didn’t have to go far to pull that one out – I’ve said it in my head so many times). Did beating myself up help me lose and maintain that weight loss? No. It just reinforced how crappy I felt about myself. And when you make change from that place of shame, it often doesn’t take hold. (It’s possible, sure, but more likely not.)
Ohotto suggests that the changes we make that are based in worthiness are more likely to succeed. I learned that one when I shifted my desire to lose weight just to feel good in my body. The times I’ve changed my eating based on that rather than “what a pig you are” have been much more successful.
Yet, shame can be a comfortable place for us. It’s been my default for so long and it takes lots of consciousness, desire and willingness to shift it. But it can be done.
It starts with an awareness. Just for today, look at the ways you shame yourself – that voice in your head telling you that you’re crap, that you never do anything right, that you don’t deserve anything good in life because you did something horrible years before and now you must pay for it.
Listen to that voice and see if you can give some compassion and love to it. (Almost as if you’re a parent comforting your child who was bullied at school.) Bring compassion and understanding to the situation first, then see if you can reframe it from a place of worthiness.
Going back to our weight issue – instead of berating yourself because you’re not fitting in your pants, offer yourself some love. Maybe you’ve been eating more than usual to mask your sadness over something. Maybe you feel defeated and eating is the only thing that helps you feel different.
Understanding the situation and what led to it isn’t letting yourself off the hook. (In the same way that forgiving someone’s hurtful behavior isn’t absolving them of the consequences.)
Instead, it’s a healthier way to shed some of the shame associated with it. When you release that shame (bit by bit), it becomes easier to make those long-term changes.
And if you’re having trouble getting past that shame, consider what payoff you’re getting by keeping it around. No one does anything without some sort of payoff (negative OR positive, it doesn’t matter).
One of the things a good intuitive can do is help you locate those blind spots and, with the help of your Guide team, make small tweaks and changes so you’re moving in the right direction, along your soul path.
The Guides are never, ever judgmental – they truly seek to support, uplift and assist you but they won’t blow smoke up your ass. If something big is going on, they’ll tell you and offer suggestions on how to change it. The actions are up to you.
If you’re running into a lot of shame that’s holding you back, book a session with me and let’s bring it to the surface and heal this part of it so you can move on.
There’s no reason to stay stuck and sad. Too much support is available for that.